“Back during the time when there were many threats against Don Bosco’s life, Grigio would come to his rescue…”
This was one of the ways on how Fr. Arnold Sanico, SDB described Grigio, the grey wolf that subsequently became the mascot of Don Bosco Schools. Relating one of those many instances in the life of Don Bosco where Grigio intervened, Fr. Arnold narrated this story:
“It was in the year 1852 when Grigio first appeared to Don Bosco. There was a time when there was someone following him; walking slow as he walked slowly, and fast as he went fast. When he turned around, he saw the man carrying a big piece of wood, intending to kill Don Bosco. Don Bosco tried to run, but at a distance, he saw a group of people with the intent of killing him as well. When all hope seems lost, however, Grigio came out of nowhere, and saved Don Bosco’s life. In fear, the people who wanted to kill him begged Don Bosco to send ‘his’ big dog away…he agreed, only with the agreement that they would never come after his life again”
Who was Grigio really, the “asong hindi naman aso”, according to Fr. Arnold?
In all of the instances when Grigio appeared in the life of Don Bosco, he can be seen as a guardian angel.
Fr. Arnold’s message to his talk this morning was “Whenever a man does what God wants, God will never fail to protect him”. It’s just like what Grigio was to Don Bosco, his protection from harm, and his guide when lost.
Don Bosco, in his lifetime, tried and tried with the best of what he can to do the Lord’s will. This was never left unnoticed. He received both sides of the coin with regards the response of the people of his time. Some admired him; while others hated him…hated him so much that they even planned to get rid of him. But what’s more important to see here is that Don Bosco did not do it for the adulation of the people…but for the glory of God. His efforts were not in vain…God came to his rescue in those trying times, and the fruits of his labor are plenty.
As the message of Fr. Arnold came to me, I remembered the last words of a saint in his dying moment. He said, “I have done my part, may Christ teach you to do yours”.
Bosconians, let us examine ourselves…Are we doing God’s will?
Who or what is our Grigio?
Let us pray to the Lord for this day that with the help and inspiration given to us by our founder and friend, St. John Bosco, we may learn to be strong in doing God’s will, and be confident in His unfailing protection over us.
St. John Bosco, pray for us.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Sharing for the day (January 29, 2009)
“May isang bata na ang gusto ay hanapin ang sikreto sa isang masayang buhay. Isang gabi, nanalangin sa sa Panginoon na ipakita sa kanya ang sagot sa kanyang paghahanap. Nang gabing iyon, nanaginip siya:
Nakita niya ang sarili niya sa isang kagubatan, at sa kagubatang iyon ay nakakita siya ng isang pilay na usa…may sugat sa binti. Takot and usa na baka maabutan siya ng mababangis na hayop, kaya nanalangin ito. Ngunit, pagkatapos ng kanyang panalangin ay may dumating na isang mabangis na lobo. Ngunit nakakamangha ang nakita ng bata…sa halip na kainin ng mabangis na lobo ang usa, nilapitan nya ito at dinilaan ang sugat nito. Dinalhan rin ng lobo ang usa ng pagkain. Nang gumaling na ang usa ay umalis na rin ang lobo.
Sa pagkakataong ito ay nagising na rin ang bata at sinabi niya sa kanyang sarili na para makamit nya ang tunay na masayang buhay, ay kailangan niyang gayahin ang usa…ipapaubaya na lang niya ang sarili niya sa Diyos.
Ngunit makalipas ang ilang araw ay tila hindi pa niya nakakamit ang gusto niyang masayang buhay. Muli siyang nagdasal sa Panginoon, ngunit sa pagkakataong ito ay tila nagrereklamo siya na kung bakit hindi pa niya nakakamit ang masayang buhay. Muli, siya ay nanaginip:
Sa pagkakataong ito, nandoon pa rin siya sa kagubatan, ngunit kasama na niya ang Panginoon. Sinabi ng bata ang kanyang hinaing sa Panginoon kung bakit hindi pa siya nagiging masaya sa kabila ng pagtulad niya sa usa sa kanyang panaginip. Sabi ng Panginoon…”Hindi dapat ang usa ang iyong tinularan, kundi and lobo”.
Yesterday’s reflection talked about happiness of the self. Today, the message was clear: to be the givers and sharers of happiness to other people.
As the institution comes closer to its peak of the celebration, people from other places are crowding in, wanting and hoping to see a change of environment…like a breath of fresh air. Yes, we have prepared exhibits, programs and activities not only for the members of this institution but also for the visitors; but what matters most is that as we experience happiness as a whole, we are able to radiate happiness to each and every one of us…Bosconians or non-Bosconians alike.
Though I am not a Salesian, I was able to see in the lives of the Salesians around me the fulfillment of one of the guidelines of their Order, which is, Joy and Optimism. Much more, that Joy and Optimism that they have are not only kept within them, but shared with the rest of the community here. I firmly attest to that.
Going against the flow, just like the ferocious wolf that reached out and helped the deer back on its feet…can be really seen as happiness. Let us pray to the Lord with the help of St. John Bosco, that we may be always agents and sharers of happiness to one another.
St. John Bosco, pray for us.
Nakita niya ang sarili niya sa isang kagubatan, at sa kagubatang iyon ay nakakita siya ng isang pilay na usa…may sugat sa binti. Takot and usa na baka maabutan siya ng mababangis na hayop, kaya nanalangin ito. Ngunit, pagkatapos ng kanyang panalangin ay may dumating na isang mabangis na lobo. Ngunit nakakamangha ang nakita ng bata…sa halip na kainin ng mabangis na lobo ang usa, nilapitan nya ito at dinilaan ang sugat nito. Dinalhan rin ng lobo ang usa ng pagkain. Nang gumaling na ang usa ay umalis na rin ang lobo.
Sa pagkakataong ito ay nagising na rin ang bata at sinabi niya sa kanyang sarili na para makamit nya ang tunay na masayang buhay, ay kailangan niyang gayahin ang usa…ipapaubaya na lang niya ang sarili niya sa Diyos.
Ngunit makalipas ang ilang araw ay tila hindi pa niya nakakamit ang gusto niyang masayang buhay. Muli siyang nagdasal sa Panginoon, ngunit sa pagkakataong ito ay tila nagrereklamo siya na kung bakit hindi pa niya nakakamit ang masayang buhay. Muli, siya ay nanaginip:
Sa pagkakataong ito, nandoon pa rin siya sa kagubatan, ngunit kasama na niya ang Panginoon. Sinabi ng bata ang kanyang hinaing sa Panginoon kung bakit hindi pa siya nagiging masaya sa kabila ng pagtulad niya sa usa sa kanyang panaginip. Sabi ng Panginoon…”Hindi dapat ang usa ang iyong tinularan, kundi and lobo”.
====
This is the summarized story of what was related to the EPC (Educative Pastoral Community) of Don Bosco Canlubang by Rev. Fr. Rey dela Cruz, SDB, Rector of the Post-Novitiate Seminary. Yesterday’s reflection talked about happiness of the self. Today, the message was clear: to be the givers and sharers of happiness to other people.
As the institution comes closer to its peak of the celebration, people from other places are crowding in, wanting and hoping to see a change of environment…like a breath of fresh air. Yes, we have prepared exhibits, programs and activities not only for the members of this institution but also for the visitors; but what matters most is that as we experience happiness as a whole, we are able to radiate happiness to each and every one of us…Bosconians or non-Bosconians alike.
Though I am not a Salesian, I was able to see in the lives of the Salesians around me the fulfillment of one of the guidelines of their Order, which is, Joy and Optimism. Much more, that Joy and Optimism that they have are not only kept within them, but shared with the rest of the community here. I firmly attest to that.
Going against the flow, just like the ferocious wolf that reached out and helped the deer back on its feet…can be really seen as happiness. Let us pray to the Lord with the help of St. John Bosco, that we may be always agents and sharers of happiness to one another.
St. John Bosco, pray for us.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
sharing for the day (january 28, 2009)
I apologize for not being able to post my sharing for quite some time, I was back home during the weekend, and missed a few days of the novena.
First of all, we are so fortunate to have with us for the next couple of days the Provincial Superior of the Salesians of Don Bosco, Rev. Fr. Eli Cruz, SDB.
In his sharing this morning, after the wreath-laying ceremony, he spoke of many things…things that were timeless, new, or even funny. At this point, allow me to share some bits and pieces of his talk, as well as my personal insights for the day.
===
“To know the person, we must go back and see where he/she came from to know and understand the person in context”
To further illustrate this thought, Fr. Eli presented the certain words and from which they came from, like the words “hapunan”, “barkada”, and more. Why was it called hapunan? Because during the early times (when there was still no electricity, and light in the evening comes from the moon, stars and lamps), dinner happens in the late afternoon. Why is it called barkada? Because it came from the word “Banca” or boat, where it shows that barkadas are definitely “in the same boat”.
Fr. Eli began his talk with this to further instill to us that where we come from really matters, much like Don Bosco, whose roots and background gave rise to such a marvelous model, father and saint. Being Bosconians ourselves, we must always be reminded that we live and are taught to be good Christians and caring people. Fr. Eli further commented that he is inspired and touched with people, especially with Bosconians, who are strong in their resolve of following Christ, in one or many ways.
===
“The three things that Bosconians love: the Blessed Sacrament, our Holy Mother Mary, and the Pope.”
Fr. Eli mentioned this in line for his main topic in his sharing for this day, which is Don Bosco’s love for the Eucharist. Besides Mama Mary and the Pope, it is worthwhile to remember that Bosconians love the Holy Eucharist.
He then related a story of how Christians in Vietnam, when it was still under the complete dominion of Communism, were able to receive communion; in spite of fear of being severely punished for the faith. He said that during that time, the priest would place the host in bars of soap, and those who know it, comes and receives them.
During this part of his sharing, I remembered that Ms. Bot Bombase, our Student Affairs In-charge for the College Department, gave me a coin with the image of Don Bosco. In its back, there inscribed the following words, and I share the same prayer: “O Saint John Bosco, teach us to love Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament”.
===
“…It all depends on whose hands it is in…”
Fr. Eli gave a wonderful analogy for this part of the talk, with which I quote:
“In my hands, a basketball is worth 800 pesos…In the hands of Michael Jordan, a basketball is worth 800,000,000 pesos…it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a stick would be nothing but a stick…In the hands of Moses, a stick divided the sea, and helped saved people from slavery and oppression… it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a slingshot would be nothing but a toy…in the hands of David, a slingshot helped to defeat Goliath… it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a bread would just be a bread…In the hands of Christ, a bread would feed thousands… it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a nail would be used by a carpenter to make and fix things…In Christ’s hands (and feet as well, for this matter), a nail becomes a symbol of our salvation… it all depends on whose hands it is in…”
===
“Who are you listening to?”
Again, Fr. Eli made a timely analogy with this part of his talk, with which again I quote:
Garfield… “I hate Mondays”
Gaara (of Naruto)…”I only love myself and I live only for myself…”
Winnie the Pooh…”It is so hard to be brave, especially if you are only a small animal”
The question is…who are you listening to?
With the many things that are thought and said in this present era of ours, we can’t help but be confused on what to do, what to hear, what to understand, and even what to believe. With this kind of situation that we’re in, what then should we do?
Psalm 118:8, which Fr. Eli mentioned in his talk, gives a clear answer to this: “It is better to trust in the Lord than to trust in men”…
===
For the remaining days of the novena and the celebration for the feast day of Saint John Bosco, please join me in prayer that with the help of our model and founder, we may…
Understand the present with the help of the past…
Love and devote ourselves to the Blessed Sacrament…
Give ourselves to God’s hands to be guided and protected…
Listen and live as faithful, moral and loving Christians…moreover, Bosconians.
Saint John Bosco. Pray for us.
First of all, we are so fortunate to have with us for the next couple of days the Provincial Superior of the Salesians of Don Bosco, Rev. Fr. Eli Cruz, SDB.
In his sharing this morning, after the wreath-laying ceremony, he spoke of many things…things that were timeless, new, or even funny. At this point, allow me to share some bits and pieces of his talk, as well as my personal insights for the day.
===
“To know the person, we must go back and see where he/she came from to know and understand the person in context”
To further illustrate this thought, Fr. Eli presented the certain words and from which they came from, like the words “hapunan”, “barkada”, and more. Why was it called hapunan? Because during the early times (when there was still no electricity, and light in the evening comes from the moon, stars and lamps), dinner happens in the late afternoon. Why is it called barkada? Because it came from the word “Banca” or boat, where it shows that barkadas are definitely “in the same boat”.
Fr. Eli began his talk with this to further instill to us that where we come from really matters, much like Don Bosco, whose roots and background gave rise to such a marvelous model, father and saint. Being Bosconians ourselves, we must always be reminded that we live and are taught to be good Christians and caring people. Fr. Eli further commented that he is inspired and touched with people, especially with Bosconians, who are strong in their resolve of following Christ, in one or many ways.
===
“The three things that Bosconians love: the Blessed Sacrament, our Holy Mother Mary, and the Pope.”
Fr. Eli mentioned this in line for his main topic in his sharing for this day, which is Don Bosco’s love for the Eucharist. Besides Mama Mary and the Pope, it is worthwhile to remember that Bosconians love the Holy Eucharist.
He then related a story of how Christians in Vietnam, when it was still under the complete dominion of Communism, were able to receive communion; in spite of fear of being severely punished for the faith. He said that during that time, the priest would place the host in bars of soap, and those who know it, comes and receives them.
During this part of his sharing, I remembered that Ms. Bot Bombase, our Student Affairs In-charge for the College Department, gave me a coin with the image of Don Bosco. In its back, there inscribed the following words, and I share the same prayer: “O Saint John Bosco, teach us to love Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament”.
===
“…It all depends on whose hands it is in…”
Fr. Eli gave a wonderful analogy for this part of the talk, with which I quote:
“In my hands, a basketball is worth 800 pesos…In the hands of Michael Jordan, a basketball is worth 800,000,000 pesos…it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a stick would be nothing but a stick…In the hands of Moses, a stick divided the sea, and helped saved people from slavery and oppression… it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a slingshot would be nothing but a toy…in the hands of David, a slingshot helped to defeat Goliath… it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a bread would just be a bread…In the hands of Christ, a bread would feed thousands… it all depends on whose hands it is in…
In my hands, a nail would be used by a carpenter to make and fix things…In Christ’s hands (and feet as well, for this matter), a nail becomes a symbol of our salvation… it all depends on whose hands it is in…”
===
“Who are you listening to?”
Again, Fr. Eli made a timely analogy with this part of his talk, with which again I quote:
Garfield… “I hate Mondays”
Gaara (of Naruto)…”I only love myself and I live only for myself…”
Winnie the Pooh…”It is so hard to be brave, especially if you are only a small animal”
The question is…who are you listening to?
With the many things that are thought and said in this present era of ours, we can’t help but be confused on what to do, what to hear, what to understand, and even what to believe. With this kind of situation that we’re in, what then should we do?
Psalm 118:8, which Fr. Eli mentioned in his talk, gives a clear answer to this: “It is better to trust in the Lord than to trust in men”…
===
For the remaining days of the novena and the celebration for the feast day of Saint John Bosco, please join me in prayer that with the help of our model and founder, we may…
Understand the present with the help of the past…
Love and devote ourselves to the Blessed Sacrament…
Give ourselves to God’s hands to be guided and protected…
Listen and live as faithful, moral and loving Christians…moreover, Bosconians.
Saint John Bosco. Pray for us.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
at the edge...
People I know come to me when they have problems, hoping that with me, they’ll find answers…or even ways to find it…
But I have no one to go to when I’m the one in need…
Some people think I’m strong…you’re wrong, I’m weak…much more, I’m dying
I’m rejected, forgotten, unwanted and taken for granted…
I’m doing everything I can to deserve even a little, but even that little is taken away from me…
No one understands me, or even what I’m going through…
I'm important to others when I am of any use...
Maybe I deserve this…
My mind’s giving up, I don’t know until when I can hold on…if I know where to
But I have no one to go to when I’m the one in need…
Some people think I’m strong…you’re wrong, I’m weak…much more, I’m dying
I’m rejected, forgotten, unwanted and taken for granted…
I’m doing everything I can to deserve even a little, but even that little is taken away from me…
No one understands me, or even what I’m going through…
I'm important to others when I am of any use...
Maybe I deserve this…
My mind’s giving up, I don’t know until when I can hold on…if I know where to
Friday, January 23, 2009
sharing for the day (january 23, 2009): 2nd day of the novena to St. John Bosco
“Taga bundok sya, Bundok Makiling. Dating estudyante dito, at dati ring nagtitinda sa canteen…
Ngayon, nandito pa rin sya, at na-promote: nakatambay na siya sa third floor…”
Those were just some descriptions that Bro. Jomar Castillo (a post novitiate brother and a classmate of mine) made to tell a little story, and impart some inspiring thought to the college students and the lay mission partners of Don Bosco College this afternoon, the second day of the novena to Saint John Bosco.
Bro. Jomar was talking about Kuya Elmer, our very industrious and simple technical assistant for the college department. He recounted his early years in this institution, on how he met Kuya Elmer, and on how he came to idolize him; being as simple and as unassuming as he is.
====
He then made a simple recollection on how he struggled during his senior year in college, still here in Don Bosco, during the time that he was doing his thesis. At those trying times, he was consoled by his adviser, Ma’am Lyn Tamayo (our former college guidance counselor), who told him: “Kung saan mahirap, dun ka!”
====
He then recounted some experiences of St. John Bosco wherein he encountered problems and hardships, like going to school far away from home when he was still a kid; and others like the things he had to deal with when he established the Oratory and the Society of Salesians of Don Bosco.
====
What’s the connection between his three sharings?
“Fire-tried Gold”… is the theme for this year’s Foundation Week celebration, marking the 46th year of the presence of Don Bosco here in Canlubang.
Bro. Jomar stated that like the theme, Don Bosco, Kuya Elmer, and even he, were made stronger by continuous hardships. Truly, hardships and problems are a constant companion of anyone…it’s inevitable. However, when we come to face these hardships, we grow stronger…and wiser in the process.
There may be a lot of trials, problems and hardships that all of us are experiencing. But with the courage to face these can make us all the more prepared for all that would still happen in our lives. Could it be problems at home work, school, or even with everything in life itself…“don’t falter, stand up, count on our Lord’s guidance and help, and choose to win over whatever life would throw at us to bring us down.”
St. John Bosco…pray for us.
Ngayon, nandito pa rin sya, at na-promote: nakatambay na siya sa third floor…”
Those were just some descriptions that Bro. Jomar Castillo (a post novitiate brother and a classmate of mine) made to tell a little story, and impart some inspiring thought to the college students and the lay mission partners of Don Bosco College this afternoon, the second day of the novena to Saint John Bosco.
Bro. Jomar was talking about Kuya Elmer, our very industrious and simple technical assistant for the college department. He recounted his early years in this institution, on how he met Kuya Elmer, and on how he came to idolize him; being as simple and as unassuming as he is.
====
He then made a simple recollection on how he struggled during his senior year in college, still here in Don Bosco, during the time that he was doing his thesis. At those trying times, he was consoled by his adviser, Ma’am Lyn Tamayo (our former college guidance counselor), who told him: “Kung saan mahirap, dun ka!”
====
He then recounted some experiences of St. John Bosco wherein he encountered problems and hardships, like going to school far away from home when he was still a kid; and others like the things he had to deal with when he established the Oratory and the Society of Salesians of Don Bosco.
====
What’s the connection between his three sharings?
“Fire-tried Gold”… is the theme for this year’s Foundation Week celebration, marking the 46th year of the presence of Don Bosco here in Canlubang.
Bro. Jomar stated that like the theme, Don Bosco, Kuya Elmer, and even he, were made stronger by continuous hardships. Truly, hardships and problems are a constant companion of anyone…it’s inevitable. However, when we come to face these hardships, we grow stronger…and wiser in the process.
There may be a lot of trials, problems and hardships that all of us are experiencing. But with the courage to face these can make us all the more prepared for all that would still happen in our lives. Could it be problems at home work, school, or even with everything in life itself…“don’t falter, stand up, count on our Lord’s guidance and help, and choose to win over whatever life would throw at us to bring us down.”
St. John Bosco…pray for us.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
quote for the day (january 22,2009)
when i joined the rest of the college department for the novena to st. john bosco just this afternoon, fr. mon borja, sdb (our administrator) gave us a little joke, but with a great deal of sense and wisdom:
"ano ang isang bagay na kahit anong hilod o kahit anong ligo, eh hindi man lang matanggal?...
...e di LIBAG!"
he then continued:
"alam nyo, pag nakikita ko si Don Bosco, para syang libag."
the college students inside the chapel burst into laughter, but fr. mon continued his talk, explaining:
"di ba, yung libag, laging nandyan sa katawan natin, much like Don Bosco. kahit anong gawin natin na tanggalin sa sistema natin si Don Bosco, o kaya ang pagiging Bosconian natin, hinding-hindi na ito mangyayari."
he asked at the end of his short talk:
"are we not glad to have Don Bosco in our lives?"
for me, i say...I AM PROUD TO BE BOSCONIAN, AND I AM PROUD TO HAVE DON BOSCO IN MY LIFE!
"ano ang isang bagay na kahit anong hilod o kahit anong ligo, eh hindi man lang matanggal?...
...e di LIBAG!"
he then continued:
"alam nyo, pag nakikita ko si Don Bosco, para syang libag."
the college students inside the chapel burst into laughter, but fr. mon continued his talk, explaining:
"di ba, yung libag, laging nandyan sa katawan natin, much like Don Bosco. kahit anong gawin natin na tanggalin sa sistema natin si Don Bosco, o kaya ang pagiging Bosconian natin, hinding-hindi na ito mangyayari."
he asked at the end of his short talk:
"are we not glad to have Don Bosco in our lives?"
for me, i say...I AM PROUD TO BE BOSCONIAN, AND I AM PROUD TO HAVE DON BOSCO IN MY LIFE!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
every once in a while, i need to clear up my mind...
Sometimes, I think that I should post intellectual or philosophical writings when I write; given the nature of my academic studies as of present. Other times, I would like to dwell on my emotions and just have my feelings poured through when I write (or type, in this manner).
Whatever the case may be, please allow me at this time to just type away whatever I feel I need to say.
=====
A few days has passed since the New Year started. The past year has generally been good to me; though I cannot doubt the fact that there were some things that happened that had never been good to me in any way.
There had been two times that my girlfriend asked for a break-up; one at August and another the following month. As I can recall, it was me who really caused it. But gladly, things went well…we’re still together. I sure learned a lot since then. But then again, I asked myself, “Does it have to happen for me to learn so much about what should be and what should not be in my relationship?”
=====
Before the year ended, I said goodbye to two friends who I really held dear to me. Deep inside me, I really tried to hold on to the fact that I have to fight for the friendship that we shared; no matter the distance between us, or even the time that passed. Then I realized, maybe it’s time for me to let go, and move on; just like what they did. That was never an easy decision for me to make, but I had to.
“Was it so wrong to look forward to promises made? Was it wrong for me to feel sad and disappointed when those promises were not brought to fruition?”
I’ve always said to people who come to me that “whatever relationship shared between people might be successful or a failure. Its success and failure would not be attributed or blamed to just one, but on all those who shared that relationship”. With that in mind, with the friends I’ve lost the past year, I am partly to be blamed. I concur.
“How many more should I let go?”
=====
I am slowly burning out. My studies are one thing, but really, what happens back home is taking so much from me. I have no problems with my parents; I really love and appreciate having them with me; supporting and encouraging me for all the things that I do and will do. Their positive attitude and outlook in life is what keeps me going on, especially in trying times that come my way. I have no problems with my elder siblings too, with my sister and brother responsibly doing their part to help around the house and being really dedicated to their respective work, I am only thankful. Also, I am deeply grateful with my older brother for being the one who supports me financially, week after week, as I go through the rest of my college stay. (My mom’s taking care of my board and lodging expenses, while my brother’s taking care of my allowance). Actually, my older brother and I are not exactly close to each other, and I can remember those times that we don’t even talk to each other when I come home from back where I studied before.
My pressing problem at present is our youngest. Somehow, I know that there’s a huge gap between us. Yes, there’s an 8-year gap in our age, and I rarely see him when I go home every week. With what I am hearing from the rest of the family, I can’t help but get irritated, sometimes get mad, with my youngest brother. Oftentimes, I end up reminding or scolding him, but then after that, I try to explain myself to him with why I acted like that. Yet, each time that happens, whatever he has been doing in the past grows more, in a negative way.
There are times that my parents scold me for treating my youngest brother harshly, if that is the real way to describe it. They say that I should understand that he’s going through that stage of discernment and exploration of self (in a psychological point-of-view). But what he’s doing, as I can it, is too much. If I am allowed to justify my actions, it is because I am more aware of the repercussions of his actions, and much more, because I am concerned with the welfare and dignity of my family.
I may be overreacting, but step in my shoes; you’ll see what I mean.
=====
Before the year ended, we were somehow scolded by our professor for not being able to live up to the challenge for the coming De Universa Comprehensive Examinations. Somehow, it dawned to me that he’s definitely right, maybe I’m not prepared. However, that’s my present predicament. There’s still time. I can do it. I can still do my best.
I believe that real failure and the real sense of not living up to the challenge comes when I give up.
=====
Maybe, with all of these said, I’ve cleared some space in my mind.
I can now continue what I need to do.
Whatever the case may be, please allow me at this time to just type away whatever I feel I need to say.
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A few days has passed since the New Year started. The past year has generally been good to me; though I cannot doubt the fact that there were some things that happened that had never been good to me in any way.
There had been two times that my girlfriend asked for a break-up; one at August and another the following month. As I can recall, it was me who really caused it. But gladly, things went well…we’re still together. I sure learned a lot since then. But then again, I asked myself, “Does it have to happen for me to learn so much about what should be and what should not be in my relationship?”
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Before the year ended, I said goodbye to two friends who I really held dear to me. Deep inside me, I really tried to hold on to the fact that I have to fight for the friendship that we shared; no matter the distance between us, or even the time that passed. Then I realized, maybe it’s time for me to let go, and move on; just like what they did. That was never an easy decision for me to make, but I had to.
“Was it so wrong to look forward to promises made? Was it wrong for me to feel sad and disappointed when those promises were not brought to fruition?”
I’ve always said to people who come to me that “whatever relationship shared between people might be successful or a failure. Its success and failure would not be attributed or blamed to just one, but on all those who shared that relationship”. With that in mind, with the friends I’ve lost the past year, I am partly to be blamed. I concur.
“How many more should I let go?”
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I am slowly burning out. My studies are one thing, but really, what happens back home is taking so much from me. I have no problems with my parents; I really love and appreciate having them with me; supporting and encouraging me for all the things that I do and will do. Their positive attitude and outlook in life is what keeps me going on, especially in trying times that come my way. I have no problems with my elder siblings too, with my sister and brother responsibly doing their part to help around the house and being really dedicated to their respective work, I am only thankful. Also, I am deeply grateful with my older brother for being the one who supports me financially, week after week, as I go through the rest of my college stay. (My mom’s taking care of my board and lodging expenses, while my brother’s taking care of my allowance). Actually, my older brother and I are not exactly close to each other, and I can remember those times that we don’t even talk to each other when I come home from back where I studied before.
My pressing problem at present is our youngest. Somehow, I know that there’s a huge gap between us. Yes, there’s an 8-year gap in our age, and I rarely see him when I go home every week. With what I am hearing from the rest of the family, I can’t help but get irritated, sometimes get mad, with my youngest brother. Oftentimes, I end up reminding or scolding him, but then after that, I try to explain myself to him with why I acted like that. Yet, each time that happens, whatever he has been doing in the past grows more, in a negative way.
There are times that my parents scold me for treating my youngest brother harshly, if that is the real way to describe it. They say that I should understand that he’s going through that stage of discernment and exploration of self (in a psychological point-of-view). But what he’s doing, as I can it, is too much. If I am allowed to justify my actions, it is because I am more aware of the repercussions of his actions, and much more, because I am concerned with the welfare and dignity of my family.
I may be overreacting, but step in my shoes; you’ll see what I mean.
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Before the year ended, we were somehow scolded by our professor for not being able to live up to the challenge for the coming De Universa Comprehensive Examinations. Somehow, it dawned to me that he’s definitely right, maybe I’m not prepared. However, that’s my present predicament. There’s still time. I can do it. I can still do my best.
I believe that real failure and the real sense of not living up to the challenge comes when I give up.
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Maybe, with all of these said, I’ve cleared some space in my mind.
I can now continue what I need to do.
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